Separation anxiety is more common than people often realize. While it’s something most often associated with children, it can affect people of all ages. Whether you’re a parent, an adult experiencing anxiety when away from a loved one, or someone dealing with this yourself, it’s important to understand what separation anxiety is, why it happens, and how to manage it.
Why Does Separation Anxiety Happen?
Separation anxiety refers to the feeling of intense fear or distress when a person is separated from someone they are emotionally attached to. While separation anxiety is commonly linked to children, it can also affect adults, often in situations like leaving for work, being away from family, or even in romantic relationships.
The causes of separation anxiety can vary from person to person. For some, it may stem from early life experiences, such as a traumatic separation from a parent or caregiver. For others, it can be a response to stress or changes in life, like moving to a new city, starting a new job, or going through a breakup.
Some psychological conditions can also contribute to separation anxiety. These may include generalized anxiety disorder (GAD), panic disorder, or depression. In these cases, the anxiety is often triggered by worries about the future or fears about personal safety and the safety of loved ones.
Common Symptoms of Separation Anxiety
When someone has separation anxiety, their emotional and physical responses can be overwhelming. Here are a few common symptoms:
Excessive Worry: Constantly worrying about the well-being of the person they are attached to or fearing something bad will happen when apart.
Clinginess: Adults or children might cling to their caregivers or partners, avoiding situations where they need to be separated.
Physical Symptoms: Symptoms like stomachaches, headaches, or nausea can occur when faced with separation.
How to Cope with Separation Anxiety
While separation anxiety feels overwhelming, there are steps you can take to cope with it. The goal isn’t to make the anxiety go away immediately, but rather to manage it in ways that allow you to live more comfortably.
Create a Routine
Having a set routine can provide a sense of comfort and predictability. When facing separation, knowing what to expect can reduce feelings of uncertainty. For children, establishing a consistent goodbye ritual can also make separations easier, such as a special phrase or a quick hug.
Gradual Exposure
One of the most effective ways to overcome separation anxiety is gradual exposure. This involves slowly increasing the time you spend apart from the person or situation that causes the anxiety. For example, if leaving for work triggers anxiety, start with short separations and gradually extend the time apart. It’s important to approach this slowly, allowing your mind and body time to adjust.
Grounding Techniques
Grounding techniques can help you stay in the present moment when you feel overwhelmed by anxiety. These can include deep breathing, counting to 10, or focusing on physical sensations like the feeling of your feet on the ground. These techniques help shift your attention away from anxious thoughts and back to your surroundings.
Make Self-Care Nonnegotiable
Taking care of your physical and mental health is essential. Exercise, proper sleep, and healthy eating habits all contribute to a calmer state of mind. Self-care activities like reading, journaling, or spending time with friends can also provide a mental break from anxiety.
Final Thoughts
Separation anxiety can feel isolating, but by trying out some of these suggestions, you can reduce its impact on your life. If your anxiety becomes intense, persistent, or begins to interfere with your daily life, it’s important to reach out to a therapist or your primary care doctor. You don’t have to face separation anxiety alone. Our office would be happy to help! So, give us a call if you’d like to chat about overcoming your separation anxiety.
Disclaimer: Our content is on and related to the topic of mental health. The content is general information that may or may not apply to you. The content is not a substitute for professional services. This website does not contain professional advice, nor is any professional-client relationship established with you through your use of this website.
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